Welcome

The sun peeked out from behind the haze and clouds today. It was brief, but oh so glorious!

I am still yucky, getting better each day, just fighting my way through. Standing outside, in those sun rays, was a welcome blessing. 

Healing comes slowly with this crud, but it comes, and that is welcome too! Physical healing comes quicker as I work on lightening the stress in my soul. There is always something there, but as I pray and ponder, I find peace and comfort, and that heals. Yet another welcome blessing!

I am grateful for healing and for a warm spot in the sun.

It warmed me down to my funky-sock-covered-toes--- just perfect!

Done!

I am so ready to be DONE with the yuckies I have had for a month now! That is a massive understatement! I thought I was almost better- been doing more and more each day, but yesterday I pushed it too far, and it hit me head first again, so I am almost right back to square one! Not. even. cool!

Here's how ya feel with this thing-

(It's the kiddos favorite card from our loved game Ooga Booga, and when you play this card you have to make an "bulgh"sound!)

How in the world are you supposed to have time to get sick when you're a mom?? There is no room in the schedule for that- least of all for a month! I've been on meds, had test run, and even gotten fluids from the doctors. They tell me it's a virus that mimics flu, except without the organ killing side affects. Well, at least that part is good. But the won't go away part is what is getting me!I have a horrid sinus infection on top of it, the worst one in my life, to boot. Ah, the joy!

I tend to lean on Western medicine, but I also have a few other secrets up my sleeve. I pulled pulled them all out for this one, and still no go! I guess it's back to decreasing some of the lists on my calendar so I can have more "get better" time! UGH! That is so not the right answer! Well, I MUST get back to normal- whatever that is :)- so I'm pulling out the calendar once again!

Doozies

You know when you get that feeling- we all get it, I assume- way deep down, in the bottom of your gut. You can't sleep well at night. It's all you think about. It's what keeps your mind going a hundred-million miles an hour. It's wondering and second guessing and just trying to figure it out. It can happen with lots of things in life- pretty much anything. Well, I don't like it.

I guess I should like it, 'cause it forces me to change and do things that are usually WAY out of my comfort zone, but I still don't :). Once it's said and done, I like it. Or at least once it's underway, and everything is falling into place, I like it! Yeah, I'm one of those plan things out, way far in advance, kinda people. I'm not really fond of surprises, unless it's jewelry, and I like to work through every-which-way option I can think of, before it happens. Yup, that's me. 

But, unfortunately for me, that's NOT life! I feel this feeling when I get creative: sewing, crafting, making, all that good stuff. It's like there is something calling to me, gnawing at me, wanting me to do, but I just can't figure out what!  I can do most anything if you will show me how to do it- I am a visual learner and am wicked good at that! So I ebb and flow with the things I create and things I work on, to try to get closer to the "whatever it is" that I can't figure out. I often wonder if it's just my sense of adventure and the endless possibilities within that just want me to keep pushing and keep creating more. It could very well be just. that. simple.

Speaking of simple... The past year or so, I have felt that annoying feeling again, in an effort to simplify, to go back to the basics, to stretch, to learn, to grow and to love all together, as a family. My brain is always churning, and whenever I get a solid enough idea, it becomes dubbed as a "hair-brained idea". I've had a few of them- some have just been ideas, some have fizzled, and some have worked out spectacularly! But hubby always shakes in his shoes when I say those words though he claims he has gotten used to it now- brave, wonderful soul! 

So this Simple, as I refer to it, has lead me to wanting to learn how to prepare, plant, and grow a garden. It has pushed me to teach myself how to can- and let me tell you that Peach Habanero jam is the best stuff under the sun! It's urging me to get rid of excess and do with less, with the things that really matter. We sit outside, when it's over 25 degrees, and eat our meals, together, as a family (yes, we have the outdoor heaters going when it's that cold). We read books together and have fantastic board game marathons together! The Simple-ness is just calling me. I've had some crazy ideas, hair-brained doozies to be exact, and thought that they were just too off-the-wall. But then, a few weeks ago, I stumbled into this from my level-headed cousin's reading list. 

Yeah, all my crazy, hair-brained ideas, penned on "paper", and living in real life. Those wild ideas of mine have actually been done, in the real world, with a real family?!! Oh dear- this was all kinds of trouble! Cause then, that means that it could be possible! My head is still having a hard time wrapping itself around that possibility- it isn't just my own imagination anymore. So now we're talking all kinds of way deep down gut-gnawing!  Could we be crazy enough to do something like that? Don't know yet. I want to be!  I want to jump, but what if you break your bum when you land? And I don't like heights! But I want to go for it so bad! :) It's calling me... but I may have to settle on being Simple where I am for a while, which is still good, just different. And that's ok too. The gnawing will lessen and my brain will settle because everyday is a journey, and although I like to have it all planned out, it is always a new adventure. At least I LOVE adventures!

Running Away

I ran away today. It was wonderful!

I took the whole family with me. 

We got away, out of the yucky air, out of the hustle, and played.

We tromped through the snow, up past our knees. We climbed all over the mountains til our legs were sore. We made monster huge, face first, snow angels.

We laughed and smiled til our cheeks hurt. 

It feels good, deep down in your soul, to just get away, be together, and play!

So good...

My Grove

We are a camping family, in our trailer, so if that's called "RVing" officially, oh well, we call it camping. Over the years we have had several trailers and motorhomes for our adventures. It seems we fix them up and then sell them. Maybe one day that will change. Maybe not. I would like to keep this new little one for a quick one night jot out of town and then have a larger motorhome for cross country trips. Our first motorhome was dubbed "The Blue Zoo", for obvious reasons. She now lives with a more mechanically minded family. My dream is to have another like her, but be a diesel pusher. Our first trip ever in her became my favorite trip of all time, and I found the best place on Earth! 

We visited the National Redwood Forest. The whole area was just wonderful, but one site specifically, has become my mental getaway. It is Stout Grove. Our children were intrigued to see the place where part of Star Wars was filmed, and I am not quite sure what I expected. I adore trees, so any place with "grove" in the name, sounded right up my alley. This spot exceeded more than I could have ever imagined or what I could have dreamed! We were there during off season, so we were pretty much the only ones there. It was perfect that way. When you walk down into the grove, the calm enfolds you. It is misty, cool, and quiet. But there are still noises- soft crackles from animals or the snap of pine needles as you walk along the path. You soften your voice and begin to talk about things that really matter. It was a magical time to share and smile and enjoy being together. There was just something indescribable about it, like you were in another world. Everyone clicked and together was the best place to be. I don't think I will ever forget that feeling- we all felt it. We have since been back again, and it was the same experience.

On crazy days, I wish that I could pull together the space of land that separates me from this grove. That's just not possible; however, I am sometimes tempted to get us all in the car and drive to that spot where the asphalt ends. To compensate for living states away from Stout Grove, I have searched for our own grove, at home. In the winter, the place has become apparent, it is our hearth. 

This is the place we gather, around a roaring fire usually, to talk, to share, to visit, and to smile and laugh. Sometimes to cry, happy or sad tears. Talk becomes more "quiet", although nothing in my home seems quiet, we talk about things that really matter. Things that bring us together and make us a tighter-knit family. We share struggles and work to overcome them, we laugh about funny occurrences during our days, and smile at memories we have made together. There is nothing magical about this hearth, but magic still happens here, nonetheless. We find peace and safety here, all gathered round. I hope we all have our own groves where we can have this special time and feel the inner calm that it brings. I have mine, not only states away, but also right here, right in front of me.

Glad to be... a nobody!

It seems funny to say, but I am sure glad that I am a "nobody". At least, a nobody as the world views it. I am very most definitely a SOMEBODY to those who matter most in life- my sweet family and friends and those around me for whom I try to make a difference. But here's why I am glad I am a nobody...

I can walk in a grocery store and just stand and listen to the hum of the lights and the soft talk of the customers. I can shop and enjoy reading labels and gathering produce without worry or bother.

I can go to a deserted beach on the Oregon coast and have it stay deserted while we are there- running and playing in the freezing ocean, gathering sea shells and finding sea creatures in the tide pools. I can feel peace and tranquility without interruption.

I can put on my grubbies and work on restoring my second tiny trailer- this one is a 10' 1965 Travelier. It is the cutest trailer ever, can sleep 6, and is in impeccable shape inside. Not too much ripping out to be done, but when I do, I don't have to worry about who is watching and what they are thinking, cause I'm just plain ole me!

I don't mind being what the world views as unimportant because I am particularly important and vital to those I care for, those I love, and those whose lives I touch. Being right where I am, doing the small things I do, I make a difference. A difference that will matter long after the six o'clock news fades, long after the rock stars get old, and long after the mansions crumble. I am not perfect by any stretch of imagination, but I am me, and that is what I do best! I want to make life better for those around me and try to become a better person in the process. If I can do that, I will accomplish my goal. So I guess being a nobody is not too bad after all :).

Remember...

When I was growing up, I would often get the chance to be at my grandparent's home. I had two favorite times: dinner and bed time, which translated to story time. Dinner was amazing because my Grandpa would come home from a hard, long day's work and tell Grandma and I the day's stories. He could tell a story like no other! As he told stories, we ate homemade food that tasted like no other.

One of the moments I will never forget, that happened at each meal, is my Grandpa stirring his entire plate of delectable food all together. I remember the first time he saw my concern. He grinned and said, "It's all goin' to the same place, Sister." He referred to all the women folk in his family as "Sister"- his daughters, sisters, nieces, granddaughters, etc. The only variation from that was how he referred to my Grandma and that was "Mother".

The stories he told were full of smiles, jokes, and exciting events that could have been everyday ordinary to some other people, but not to us! No, there was always something interesting and moving about the moments of his day. Once the food was finished, Grandma would offer the prized dessert, Ice Milk. It was a watered down version of ice cream, and it was "better for you". Gobble it up, I did. There were Fudge Stripe cookies that could be added to the Ice Milk, which probably negated the "better for you" part, but delicious nonetheless.

Once the evening was over, the bedtime part of the day came. I would crawl under the covers in my grandma's bed and Grandpa would sit beside me. He didn't even have to ask which stories I wanted to hear. It was always the same, and The Three Pigs was my favorite. For such a simple, little tale, my grandpa made it come to life. It still lives in my mind, almost 13 years after his death, as the most incredible story. I must admit, though, it was the way he told it. He had a gift, and that gift could make any tale sheer entertainment. There is no other way to explain it- you had to hear it from his lips to understand. The characters were alive, in front of you, and you could witness the action each time he spoke. As the story would end, I would have always drifted off to sleep. If sleep now could be like the sleep of those childhood days...

I remember so I can give the gift of stories and sharing to my own children. There is something magical about reading and telling stories. It is a simple thing, but something that can affect a life. If their memories can be half as full as mine, then I will have done my job! However, I don't think I could ever stir my plate all together, even if it is all goin' to the same place ;)